Being single has its ups and downs doesn't it? The ups; you can eat ribs, spaghetti bolognese, pizza and everything else which makes a mess that you're too scared to eat in front of your date. You can fart and burp. You can go to the toilet in your house without worrying he might hear...something. No fretting over unfaithfulness, no worrying over the fact you can't be Gwyneth Paltrow-bendy in bed without breaking a hip, no worrying that someone else might try to steal your man. Etc etc....
The downs? No sex.
NO SEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*breathe*
I don't feel the confidence to pick up blokes any more, I'm pretty shit at it. I used to be very good at flirting, but now all I think when I try to flirt is "He just wants me to go away and come back slimmer and blonder". Luckily for me I have tremendous boobs, so where I fail facially and er, sizely - I make up for in cleavage. Plus, I'm not really a "let's go out and pick up blokes" kind of person. On a Saturday night out I just want to dance and have a laugh with my friends. You seldom meet decent guys in a club or bar anyway.
So what else is there? Well I hope to meet a nice guy through work. That's pretty much my only option. Maybe I should join a mechanics course or something....?
I used to prefer being in a relationship, but now I fear the heartbreak. I know that sounds a bit poofy, but it's true. Where's the sense in falling for someone if they're going to turn out to be a douchebag? I should probably try playing the field.....but I doubt I'll get past the gate.
Honestly, how many of you women have wished you could be just like Samantha Jones from Sex & the City? Imagine having a heart of (almost) steel and being able to pick a guy up, shag his brains out, then say goodbye without even a second thought? Never having to grow attached and then have your heart ripped out? Sounds good to me. Maybe I should start practising.
To hump or not to hump...? I'll give it some thought. Need to find a key for that gate.
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